Tailgating... doesn't mean I follow your god too closely!

Tailgating... doesn't mean I follow your god too closely!
Living in Texas means having to read a lot of ignorant bumper stickers. They're the automotive equivalent of a dunce's cap and more obnoxious than idiots with no muffler. As such, here are some responses to actual religious bumper stickers.

Ha, ha! That's so clever. You're going to get a Fields Medal for that postulate. No, I have a better proof that's actually backed with proof:

Know Jesus, Know Bullshit.
No Jesus, No Bullshit.

Ummmm, that doesn't sound like an equation for forgiveness. What's your position on the death penalty again?

Is he the guy who threw a cross-shaped object through your stained glass window?

Sell now! I hear they're just giving that shit away for free.

If you had any sense, you'd say it loudly and often. In fact, just cut off the top 25% of the sticker and you'll stop acting the fool.

Then fuck, dude. Get out and meet real people. Most of us stopped having imaginary buddies by the time we were four.

First of all, "U" can't spell. Second, I should point out that you can't be Catholic without supporting a child molesting clergy who shelter one another from detection and prosecution. And there's your easy out of this dillema: Stop being Catholic!!!

I'll take "archaic justifications for genocide" for $200, Alex.

See what happens when you don't get an education, kids?

Sorry, no. That would be the tilt of the Earth's axis. And just let me guess your position on evolution...

Note: It works to raise CO₂ levels that advance global warming. Please go out and do something productive with your life instead.

And Jesus was a man. Ergo, real men are gay. Thanks for confusing the fuck out of everyone with yet another contradiction.

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